So, my best friend left me.
Sad. Very sad. I miss him so much. I see him every day in the class. That awkward eye contact. Ufff.
The most troubling part is that this time the 'fight' was serious. In fact, very very serious. We've had our fair share of fights (too many to mention) but this time i felt that the issue was deep rooted. I could smell long harbored hatred for me from his side. That's what shattered me. My heart was crushed to pieces after so long. And more than anger i was saddened. He accused me of being a jinx in his life!!Imagine after so many years so friendship and love, this is what i get. Maybe bad times change people and out of desperation he thought it was me who 'caused' all the crap in his life. But why did he forget the support part. When i was there for him. Times when i hugged him long enough to seep the warmth through his troubled heart. I know i can't take away his troubles but i can stay by his side no matter how dark the night gets. But he he shoved me away like dirt.
I have always been a complex person to deal with i know. I am always surrounded by people, i am extrovert but its just the outer shell. The REAL person in me is so timid, insecure and emotional that i prefer to keep it away from the day light. He said i ill treated him. Yes. I have a habit of leg pulling. But he never saw that i never ever allowed anybody to say crap about him. I could say things to him cause i was his bestie. (I thought) But i am the culprit. Guess, will always be. He is the only person that i have connected soul to soul. Never have i felt this way for another friend. The beautiful times we had. All the fun everything got cursed in a single moment. Apparently, for him what people say matters hell a lot. More than the bond we had. Well, we still have that bond, will always have. Cause that is something natural. We dint work on that. He brought up things like''I have done so much for you and you treated me like s**t''..''Things like dropping you home'' Hahaha ye sab kahan se aaya humaare beache mein yaar?
He used to like me. The romantic way. But i have always been confused about him (still am). Not because he ain't worth it but because i dint wanna hurt him. But that dint work for us either. (He has been super furious cause i chose to date other guys. Not his fault). The realities of life will kill our relationship if i choose him as my life partner but i can NEVER let that happen. He has always been too precious to me. Hey! but i anyways lost him to life. I wish i could run away with him to some far off place where no one could find us and life was just as beautiful as our friendship. Ahhh...hate it yaar!!
Pagal hai wo. Just like me.
We weren't romantically involved but he was (is) my soul mate.
I will miss him. Always.
Sad. Very sad. I miss him so much. I see him every day in the class. That awkward eye contact. Ufff.
The most troubling part is that this time the 'fight' was serious. In fact, very very serious. We've had our fair share of fights (too many to mention) but this time i felt that the issue was deep rooted. I could smell long harbored hatred for me from his side. That's what shattered me. My heart was crushed to pieces after so long. And more than anger i was saddened. He accused me of being a jinx in his life!!Imagine after so many years so friendship and love, this is what i get. Maybe bad times change people and out of desperation he thought it was me who 'caused' all the crap in his life. But why did he forget the support part. When i was there for him. Times when i hugged him long enough to seep the warmth through his troubled heart. I know i can't take away his troubles but i can stay by his side no matter how dark the night gets. But he he shoved me away like dirt.
I have always been a complex person to deal with i know. I am always surrounded by people, i am extrovert but its just the outer shell. The REAL person in me is so timid, insecure and emotional that i prefer to keep it away from the day light. He said i ill treated him. Yes. I have a habit of leg pulling. But he never saw that i never ever allowed anybody to say crap about him. I could say things to him cause i was his bestie. (I thought) But i am the culprit. Guess, will always be. He is the only person that i have connected soul to soul. Never have i felt this way for another friend. The beautiful times we had. All the fun everything got cursed in a single moment. Apparently, for him what people say matters hell a lot. More than the bond we had. Well, we still have that bond, will always have. Cause that is something natural. We dint work on that. He brought up things like''I have done so much for you and you treated me like s**t''..''Things like dropping you home'' Hahaha ye sab kahan se aaya humaare beache mein yaar?
He used to like me. The romantic way. But i have always been confused about him (still am). Not because he ain't worth it but because i dint wanna hurt him. But that dint work for us either. (He has been super furious cause i chose to date other guys. Not his fault). The realities of life will kill our relationship if i choose him as my life partner but i can NEVER let that happen. He has always been too precious to me. Hey! but i anyways lost him to life. I wish i could run away with him to some far off place where no one could find us and life was just as beautiful as our friendship. Ahhh...hate it yaar!!
Pagal hai wo. Just like me.
We weren't romantically involved but he was (is) my soul mate.
I will miss him. Always.
And i'm not a jinx.“If she's amazing, she won't be easy. If she's easy, she won't be amazing. If she's worth it, you wont give up. If you give up, you're not worthy. ... Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.”
